Death, the ultimate truth ?!

I cant help but scribble things down.. there s a sudden urge to write down.. write down all that I can !!!

Have so many things running around in my head.. from moving back to my parents to leavin NCR(n my perfect li life).. from moving out of my comfortable office desk to my new study table. From not getting troubled by “open positions” to getting worried about algebra and vocab.

Life keep unfolding various chapters n we like dummies keep going on doing our chores.

I recently read “Tuesdays with Morrie” by Mitch Albom. Its an memoir/ pieces of conversations between an extremely ailing college professor and his once upon a time student.

Though my personal experiences with death rather my relatives dying have been few, but I clearly remember each experience.

There is a general notion/ blockage Indian mentality has regarding Death along with plenty others. Death is a subject less discussed, less understood, more dramatized, more feared phenomenon.

I wouldn’t disagree that all across cultures and societies death is the ultimate fear people fear! And there are cultures who accept Death as an ultimate truth. People accept it deep down but our conditioning is such that nobody wants it. We are animals with survival instincts and dying is not very welcome. But why cant we accept it as a truth we all have to face? Why my religion, my society makes it so difficult to deal with it??!! The idea behind mentioning Mitch’s book was the fact that I wanted to bring out the only fact I liked the book for was- that Morrie(the ailing professor) had all the courage in this world to accept his own demise, he himself was well prepared and made other people around him, his loved ones celebrate his life and was cheery about himself till the end. Even when he could not move from his wheelchair, couldn’t take care of his personal chores, was not able to swallow or drink anything and was just plain counting his last breaths.

All I am questioning is that why cant we have an attitude like this about life and death.

The entire time we are living, we are not living we are merely existing or surviving, when we come to know that our end is close, all we do is close even before we have to and wait for it !!

The zeal to live the zeal to celebrate ones life is not there at all.

Yes there are certain cases, where death comes in disguise and there is nothing one can do about it, but in cases where death is waited for and waited for in extreme grief in a kind of a disserting disheartening experience.

Why cant we rise above the shackles of human myopic vision. Celebrate one’s life till it lasts and live it up till the end.

During ones goodbye days, one feels like a liability on others, one thinks he/she has become a pain to their loved ones, but there can be a different perspective to it. Just like parents nurture their little ones, that’s how once been children can now take care of their ailing parents/aunts/uncles.

You might argue that I am taking an idealistic perspective, but things can be done in a smoother fashion. Life can be lived in a better way and sure death can be dealt with a little more intelligence and little more of sentiments rather than over done emotions. What really makes my heart ache is the fact that people make a show of anyone’s last days. He/she is made an object to see, to witness how he/she decays till the end.

Yes love, sympathy, respect are the things which would make you visit/ stay close to a dying relative/friend/neighbour. But one need to respect his/her condition, family space and lot of other factors and make sure you don’t trespass your boundaries.

Ones most life is lived for many lives.. we live for parents, we live for spouses, we live for friends, we live for our children, we live for our sick society, we live for everyone possible, under the illusion that we are living for ourselves.

But I think when one dies, one should die for himself or herself.

Because people.. parents,, spouses,,children,,society would remember you anyway if you are meant to be remembered in their hearts in their minds in their life like a beautiful memory, they would remember all the good times and making our ailing/goodbyes days as good memories is totally up to us.

The cycle of life and death has to be understood by us, it’s the truth we have to face, either today or tomorrow.

Song recommended: Gravedigger by Dave Mathews, Some Devil(2003)